How to choose your bridesmaids

Some brides know from a young age who they want as their bridesmaids, but many brides can have so many wonderful, gorgeous girls that the decision can be more than tricky.

Keep it in the family with your bridesmaids?

Choosing between family and friends is not an easy task and many brides feel a strong obligation towards their family first and foremost. Bear in mind, this is your day and your friends are the family you choose. Whether it is your sister or your best friend, there is more to the decision than whom you are closest to. The bridesmaids need to be supportive, positive and calm under pressure. In addition, they should be good organisers and you must trust them to give honest opinions. Your bridesmaids will be your support network through the whole thing so make sure you are happy and comfortable with your choice and not just trying to keep others happy.

Getting the right mix of bridesmaids

If the bridesmaid decision is a tough one then think about it in a more rational way. You need to get the mix right, so if your best friend and your cousin can’t bear to be in the same room then this is an instant bad match. As much as you may love them this is your day, and if you even have the slightest inkling that things could turn nasty then this is one drama scene you can do without. You bridesmaids are meant to be there to help take away as much of the worry from you as possible, so don’t choose combinations of people that will end up creating it.

Safety in numbers when choosing bridesmaids?

Being mindful of missing anyone out is often at the forefront of a bride’s mind. If your budget does not allow you to have as many bridesmaids as you desire, then ask yourself these questions: who will be most suitable for the role? Who would not be upset if you didn’t choose them? And if you still can’t decide, perhaps suggest they contribute towards their dress so that they can all be bridesmaids. If they are not willing to contribute, then they can’t want it that much, right?

Backstage pass for your 'non-bridesmaid'

If you have too many doting ladies then why not consider a ‘behind the scenes’ girl? This is a role for someone who is there to help with the organising but without the centre stage role on the day (not everyone likes the limelight!) This way you get the best of both worlds – the support of all your ladies without needing to dress them!

Flower girls and page boys - the kids are alright

Flower girls and page boys may well add to the cute factor, but equally they can add to the stress factor. Keep in mind the unpredictability of the little darlings; if you can keep smiling through a tantrum during the vows or an impromptu speech when cutting the cake, then maybe you can handle it. Just make sure you pick a bridesmaid who is great with kids and can keep them all in order on the day – think Pippa at the Royal wedding.

Experienced bridesmaid - been there, done that

There’s nothing like the benefit of wisdom. If you are having a tough time selecting your bridesmaids then going for someone with previous experience is a definite advantage. During the process of planning, visiting venues, dress fittings and rehearsals having someone who has done it all before will be such a load off your mind. While you are overcome with excitement, nerves and stress, she will be the one keeping it all together and preserving your happiness and serenity.